


Promises of Gold

by Metal_Chocobo



Category: Women's Hockey RPF
Genre: Angst, Canadian Women's National Ice Hockey Team, Disappointment, Ending up with Silver, Gen, Going for Gold, Hope, Olympics, United States Women's National Ice Hockey Team, or Bronze
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-30
Updated: 2014-07-30
Packaged: 2018-02-11 00:58:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2047023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Metal_Chocobo/pseuds/Metal_Chocobo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Julie Chu and her experience with the 1998, 2002, 2006, 2010, and 2014 Winter Olympics.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Promises of Gold

**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks to sujoy13 for betaing.

**—Feb 18th, 1998, Wallingford, Connecticut—**

Julie Chu let out a large whoop as she leaped off the couch. The US women’s hockey team had just beaten Canada! The very first gold medal for Women’s Olympic Ice Hockey had gone to America. Julie had never been more proud of her country as she watched the US swarm the ice in a massive hug-fest on the girls’ lounge TV.

Her teammates hugged her and Julie was happy to hug them back. She also exchanged high fives with a few of the other girls who had deigned to stick around and watch the hockey game. The headmaster had given the entire student body a school holiday so that they could watch the US play Canada for gold on the tape-delayed telecast of the game this morning. As surprising as that may have sounded to an outsider, this happened because the youngest member of Team USA was Angela Ruggiero, a student from Julie’s school, Choate Rosemary Hall. As a freshman Julie had barely met the senior, but they were both on the girl’s hockey team and she had heard amazing stories about ‘Rugger’ from her teammates. She was so excited to watch not only her country, but also her teammate make history. Still, Julie didn’t stick around to celebrate with her friends for very long because the person she wanted to share it with the most was back home.

She walked back to her room. Julie sat down at her desk and spun about on her swivel chair giggling happily. They had won! Having a team represent her and her sport on the world stage was such a heady feeling she couldn’t help but express it. At least her roommate was elsewhere, so Julie wasn’t worried about getting teased for being such a hockey geek. However, she did want to share her feelings over the game with one of the most important people in her life. Julie picked up the phone and quickly punched in the ten-digit number. Then she sat back in her chair, twisting a finger in the cord, waiting for someone to answer.

“Hello?” a woman answered.

“Did you watch the game, mom?” Julie breathlessly asked.

“Of course I did, Julie,” Miriam laughed. “You know we always watch the Olympics together and even if that couldn’t happen this year, I would never miss a game that meant this much to you.”

“We won! We won! The US beat Canada for gold and we were undefeated against the best of the best,” Julie said. She was unable to stay as quiet as she had wished. Her free hand clamped over her mouth to muffle her squeals, but her mother still heard them.

“I can’t remember the last time I saw such an exciting game,” Miriam said. “My heart is still pounding.”

“I know,” Julie agreed. “I was so scared after Goyette cut our lead in half because they could have easily tied and dragged it into overtime. I don’t know if we would have won if it had gone into overtime because Canada was playing so much better than they had last time. Then, with only eight seconds on the clock Sandra Whyte scored an empty netter and we got a two goal lead.”

“I know, Julie, I was watching too.”

“Whyte was so good in this game. I mean, she not only scored at the end, but she assisted Ulion and Looney with the other two goals for our team.”

“I know, Julie.”

“Rugger was also fantastic through out all of the Olympics! It’s hard to believe she’s the youngest person on the whole team!” Julie breathed.

“Rugger?” Miriam asked. “That name isn’t familiar to me.”

“Angela Ruggiero,” Julie sighed. Her mom was wonderful, caring, supportive, and had even learned hockey’s rules for Julie’s sake, but she still didn’t understand how hockey players interacted. “She’s the senior from my school. She’s fantastic, or at least she’s supposed to be. I’ve only practiced a little bit with her. Oh my gosh, I’ve practiced hockey with an Olympic champion!”

“Ah yes, Ruggiero. She is very impressive,” Miriam said. “It took me a little while to figure out who you were talking about since Angela Ruggiero isn’t the one you’re always talking about.”

“You’re right mom, Rugger is pretty cool, but Cammi Granato will always be my favorite,” Julie continued. “As captain she holds the team together. Cammi leads and supports everyone else.”

“Cammi Granato is a great hockey player. I’m glad you have someone to look up to.”

“I’m crying, mom,” Julie said. She wiped both her cheeks, but the tears just kept sliding down.

“Oh sweetheart.”

“It’s okay. They’re good tears. I’m just so happy.”

“Did you get enough sleep last night, Julie? I know how excited you get the night before something important.”

“I’m gonna do it,” Julie said. She nodded, swallowing hard as she stopped the tears through sheer force of will. “In four years I’m going to be on the Olympic ice. I’m gonna play the best hockey of my life and bring home the gold.”

There was a pause. Julie swallowed again as she could feel the blood pumping in her ears, but she didn’t take back what she had said. She had been thinking on and off about this, as a fantasy really, since it had been announced three years ago in ’95 that there would be an Olympic women’s team for hockey in the 1998 Nagano games. She was good. In her gut Julie knew that in four years she would be Olympic good. After the last ten days of watching hockey on NBC that fantasy had solidified into a goal, one which Julie had already fully committed to. She hadn’t planned on telling anyone else yet, but now that the words were out Julie refused to take them back. A woman had to live by her word.

“Making the US Olympic team is quite possibly the most difficult thing you could ever attempt. It is a goal years down the line that you may never reach. You will have a difficult road ahead of you,” Miriam said. “But I know you embody commitment, honor, unity, and your middle name ought to have been ‘hard work’ instead of ‘Wu.’ If you put in the effort and truly dedicate yourself to that goal I believe you will achieve it, Julie.”

“I’m going to make you proud,” Julie promised. She could feel her heart soar on the faith and love of her mother. The least she could do was her absolute best.

“Oh Julie, you have no idea how very proud I already am of you,” Miriam said. “Now go study. You don’t want to fail that exam.”

“I love you, mom.”

“I love you too.”

Julie hung up her phone with a sigh. She sat at her desk, hands on her knees, still keyed up from the game. After a minute though she pulled out her math textbook and class notebook because her mom was right. Flipping the beginning of the section on the exam Julie started working on the math problems her teacher hadn’t assigned as homework. While she had already read and reviewed her notes and old homework Julie found that actually doing extra problems was the easiest way for her to finish preparing for tomorrow’s exam. Math problems weren’t exactly how Julie wanted to celebrate the US Women Olympic hockey team’s win, but she knew geometry didn’t care a whit how good she was at hockey.

* * *

**—Feb 21st, 2002, West Valley City, Utah—**

Even though it had been her goal for the last four years, Julie still couldn’t believe she had made it to the Olympics. Here she was at nineteen with the best women in the US, the best women in the world, about to suit up and play in the second gold medal game for women’s ice hockey in Olympic history. She was playing with Cammi Granato! Julie couldn’t imagine a better team with a better captain. It had taken her ages to get used to playing with Cammi. Now though, Julie was proud to not only call her a hero, but also a friend. She was proud to call all of her teammates friends.

Julie was suited up except for her feet. They were still barefoot. She quickly pulled a sock onto her left foot, then slipped on her skate and laced it up. She had to pause when she turned her attention to her right foot. Just below her ankle on the outside of her foot were five interlocking multicolored rings with a blue thirteen under them. She still found it surprising to see the Olympic rings and her number tattooed to her foot, despite the fact it was over a month since she had finished the after care. Even weirder was the fact that right after Julie made the team and was guaranteed going to the Olympics was that her dad, Wah, decided to get that tattoo first because he had made a promise to his daughter. Julie had never believed for a second when they made that deal two years ago that Wah would actually get a tattoo if she made it to the Olympics. She never should have doubted her father. He was the man who taught her to stand by her word. 

The situation was even more surreal because what should have been two tattoos turned into five. As soon as Julie’s mother heard about the deal, she and Julie’s siblings, Christina and Richard, also agreed to it. The boys got their tattoos on their arms, the girls on their ankles. It became a family tattoo that represented their full support for Julie both on and off the ice. Commitment, Honor, Unity; Chu. There hadn’t been a single day since Julie started her Olympic journey that she didn’t recite the family motto at least once. Those were words to live by.

Julie gave her tattoo one quick rub before pulling on the socks for her right foot. Then she pulled on her skate, laced it up, and grabbed her helmet and stick. She was ready for warm ups with her team. The US women’s hockey team was undefeated in the history of the Olympics. They were expected to win. They were going to win. She would bring home the gold for her country, her family, and for herself.

The game got off to a rocky start when Ouellette scored for Canada less than two minutes into the game. Sarah DeCosta lunged for it, but that was the first puck to clear her defenses during the 2002 Olympics. Things started to get better for the US when Katie King tied the game at the beginning of the next period, but then Sue Merz fell and crashed into Sarah, allowing Wickenheiser to score. Then somehow Hefford nimbly caught a pass that allowed her to entirely bypass the US defense and shoot on the net unhampered in the last second of the period. As the buzzer sounded Julie couldn’t believe the score had become 3-1, Canada’s favor. The mirror image of the end of the last gold medal game. It was not a happy team in the locker room. 

Julie was frustrated. She had yet to meaningfully contribute to this game against Canada. She knew she could do it. In the games leading up to the Olympics they had beaten Canada eight times. Also, Julie had scored two goals and made two assists during the Olympics. She knew she could compete against this team and at the Olympic level. So she didn’t understand why she couldn’t manage both at the same time. Canada had spent most of the game dominating despite all the penalties the referee Livingston had handed them. Katie’s goal had only come in the fifth consecutive penalty against Canada. A lot of fans seemed unhappy about the US referee’s calls, citing favoritism. Julie chose to believe they were accurate—or at least made on good faith—but even she, a USA team member, had to admit the calls were getting a touch absurd. Especially when they couldn’t seem to capitalize on them.

Julie scrubbed her face in the bathroom sink. She took a moment to refocus and find her calm center. Benjamin Smith, their coach, had just given them a talk that essentially boiled down to ‘play more aggressively.’ Sarah was staying in net because she was a good defensive goalie. They could score three times against Canada, or at least twice and drag it into overtime. After all, anything could happen in overtime.

With that in mind Julie went out to play the best hockey with the best team of her life. She was more aggressive and made her first two shots of the night on St-Pierre. Unfortunately, the goalie was able to stop both of them. Finally, with three and a half minutes left in the game, Karyn Bye slapped one past St-Pierre bringing the gap to only one. Julie felt energy bubble up from a previously unknown well. The game was still alive. One goal was all they needed to tie it up and they had three and a half minutes to do it. This was where Julie’s hard work and dedication mattered. Julie would prove putting her on Team USA was the right decision. She’d make good on her word.

Sadly, Karyn’s goal was the last of the night. They pulled Sarah with 1:14 left in the game, but that didn’t help. Canada won 3-2 leaving the US with the defeat of silver. They had pummeled Canada in the last eight games. The US women’s ice hockey team had beaten everyone in the history of the Olympics. Except this time. Except when it really counted.

Julie stared in shock as the Canadians rushed St-Pierre, who was still in net. Those women were a happy mass of hugs the way the US had been four years ago when Julie watched them on TV. The way she had expected to end her day today. She lined up beside her teammates on one side of the ice as the Canadians did the same on their side. A sense of numbness settled over Julie as she looked around the arena. Her teammates were crying or withdrawn. Angela, who had been an even bigger hero than Cammi in some ways for Julie while she was in high school, looked like she was about to burst into tears at any moment. Karyn and Tara Mounsey leaned on their sticks as they stared across the ice. Julie followed their line of sight and saw Wickenheiser receive a baby. All the Canadians were crying out of joy. Wickenheiser then accepted a bouquet of flowers and a medal around her neck. Julie couldn’t watch anymore.

She turned her gaze back to her own team, which was a sight almost as bad. Sara Tueting, who had backed Sarah up for this game, had buried her face into her uniform as far as it could allow while she still stood up straight. Her hands were balled up in the ends of her jersey sleeves, hidden like most of her hair, which was tucked under a knitted black hat with white triangles around the edges. Julie felt bad for Sara. While Julie at least had gotten onto the ice before ultimately failing, Sara had never even gotten the chance. She was benched the whole time completely unable to assist her team. Sara would never know if her presence on the ice would have made a difference. She barely looked up when the silver medal was placed around her neck.

Julie managed a smile when she received her silver medal. It felt incredibly heavy around her neck. She picked it up to examine it. There was a goalie in net and a hockey player in front who had just performed a slap shot outward. At the bottom of the goalie’s feet were the words ‘Salt Lake City’ and at the top of the medal it said ‘2002.’ Julie flipped the medal over and found the back shiny enough to see her reflection. She was crying. She hadn’t noticed.

Someone patted her on the back. Julie looked up to see Cammi smiling ruefully at her. She immediately felt embarrassed. Cammi didn’t have to comfort her. There were younger girls on the team who needed the captain’s attention more. Lyndsay Wall was only sixteen. Julie was an adult. Why, she had even deferred her first year at Harvard to play in the Olympics. She couldn’t have done that if she was just a stupid kid.

“Next time,” Cammi said with a firm nod. “Next time we’ll take gold. You and me, Julie. We’ll put the US back on top in 2006 and make our nation proud. Until then take pride in your silver medal. Only a few people in the world put in enough hard work and dedication to reach the Olympics and even less have the talent to medal. You did real damn good, kid, and you’ll be even better next time. We both will.”

Julie nodded fiercely, her tears flying in every direction. She swallowed hard, pushing that numbness and bitter disappointment down into her gut so that she could use it as fuel to push her farther in the future. She leaned against her captain’s arm for the rest of the ceremony, taking comfort in her solid confidence. Cammi was right. Julie would work hard and hone her skills at Harvard. She would become a winner for her university in the NCAA and turn into the stronger, faster, more skilled, and most importantly, experienced player the US Olympics team needed. Together Cammi and Julie would earn gold in 2006.

* * *

**—Feb 20th, 2006, Turin, Italy—**

Cammi was wrong. Neither she nor Julie knew it when she said that in 2002. They didn’t know when they won the 4 Nations Cup in 2003, received silver in the IIHF Women’s World Championship and the 4 Nations Cup in 2004, or when they won the IIHF Women’s World Championship in April. With less than 300 days until the beginning of the Olympics, Cammi and Julie were both still under the impression Cammi would play in the Olympics. However, April was the last time Cammi Granato ever played for Team USA.

Julie tried not to feel bitter when she played without her captain at the 4 Nations Cup in November. It was lonely in the locker room without Cammi, or her stuffed frog, Floppy, who she always petted for luck before the game. They lost to Canada, the only team that had ever beaten the US in international competition earning themselves yet another silver. Ben gave some line about players being unable to play forever when he cut Cammi from the roster. She didn’t voice it out loud, but Julie knew he was wrong in the marrow of her bones. She had been with the program since its inception in 1990, played in 54 games with 54 goals and 42 assists making her the all-time leading scorer in women’s international hockey. Sure, she’d be 34 by the time the Olympics arrived, but Julie knew there were men roughly that old who had played and there was no one more qualified to be the US captain. Sue Merz, a former teammate, called the decision despicable and a terrible example to the team because it set the tone that every player was expendable. Cammi hadn’t wanted to play forever; she had just wanted one last Olympics while she was still good enough to do so. One last chance for vindication. When Ben Smith cut Cammi he sold out loyalty and commitment, effectively destroying any chance for team unity. At least Cammi Granato still had her honor. Julie also retained hers, which is why she continued to play her hardest. She didn’t play for her coach, she played for her country, herself, and most importantly, her team.

It was a shock when Sweden backstabbed them in the semifinals. Perhaps it shouldn’t have been, they had played well against Russia and slaughtered Italy, losing only to Canada. Team USA had done okay up until this game, shut out Germany and Switzerland before besting Finland 7-3. Julie had assists against Germany and Finland, but she just didn’t feel the team clicking as well as it usually did. She suspected it had something to do with their new captain. Krissy Wendell was a good friend and Julie had voted for her along with the rest of the team when they needed to choose a new captain, but she was no Cammi Granato. She was a pale substitute. Krissy wasn’t a natural leader like Cammi. Sure, she was a good scorer and could articulate a plan well, but her presence didn’t draw people’s attention, inspire or instill confidence. She couldn’t unify the team the way Cammi naturally did. Perhaps that was why they weren’t able to overcome Sweden. If it was, it wasn’t Krissy’s fault.

Team USA started out strong with Kristin King making the first goal of the game with an assist by Julie. Twelve minutes into the game Julie took her best shot at the net. While she was disappointed Martin blocked her shot, Julie didn’t really mind because Kristin was able to score on the rebound. They kept the pressure up for the rest of first period. Then early in the second period Kelly Stephens increased the lead. However, late in second period Rooth scored for Sweden and then Lyndsay was pick pocketed, which allowed Rooth to yet again score and this time tie the game in the last twenty seconds of the period.

Julie couldn’t believe what had just happened. They had just blown a two-goal lead against Sweden. It seemed unbelievable, and yet this was exactly the sort of thing Ben had been warning them about, Sweden and Finland were both looking to finally overthrow the US. If they couldn’t get their act together that would happen in this game. Julie took a couple of deep breathes and promised to buckle down in the third period. They had to beat Sweden because they had a date with Canada in the gold medal match. Julie had to make it there for Cammi, but she had no idea how that could actually happen without her captain.

The game went to a shoot out. This filled Julie with dread because there was nothing she could do to help her team in this situation. She just wasn’t considered a good enough choice. Martin, the goalie for Sweden, blocked Natalie Darwitz and Jenny Potter’s shots, while Chanda Gunn did the same for Holst and Ansson. Then Angela took her shot and missed, but Martin had been too fast leaving her crease, which meant Angela got to redo the shot. Julie felt her spirits lift as Angela got a second chance, but they were dashed as she missed again. They crashed even further when Winberg scored. Then it was Krissy’s chance, but this didn't relieve Julie. Krissy had yet to live up to Cammi’s captaincy. She continued to the best of her ability, but shot too wide and missed the net entirely. Then it was Rooth’s turn and she slipped her third puck of the game past Chanda with a wrist shot, confirming Sweden’s victory.

Julie felt something small die inside of her as Rooth flailed in celebration on the ice. Sweden would medal higher than them. The US wouldn’t even play in the gold medal game. Julie couldn’t carry out any of her promise to Cammi. Since the creation of the national team program in 1990 the US had never lost an international competition to anyone other than Canada before. With a sinking sensation Julie realized that depending on how the next game shook out they might not even medal. They couldn’t be the first women’s team unable to bring at least something home for the US. Whatever small perverse pleasure the darkness in Julie’s heart might have enjoyed in seeing Team USA fall apart after expelling the face of women’s hockey perished the moment Rooth’s puck bypassed Chanda. The US Women’s hockey program was too young and ill supported to not provide results. Naysayers who thought girls couldn’t play hockey would use this as proof that women shouldn’t play hockey—no matter how poorly the men’s team might do in comparison—and cut the program’s funding. Depending on how severe the cuts were it could cause the US to ultimately pull out of women’s hockey entirely, crushing the hopes and dreams of little girls everywhere. Without the US, Canada would reign supreme, the sport would be declared too one sided, and women’s Olympic hockey would disappear. Julie refused to do such a disservice to the thing she loved most in this world.

Even after they made it into the locker room Julie didn’t cry. She wanted to, a lot of the other women were, but she couldn’t. She was now a role model for her younger teammates and this was a time when they needed her to be strong. There were fourteen returning Olympians when Julie joined the team, but this year there were only eight. A lot more of the girls had bonded with her, specifically looked to her for their example. Julie was the one who had to show these girls how to handle crushing disappointment on an entirely new scale of existence, internalize that pain and turn it into fuel to drive them further without breaking down. That was a difficult task to manage when all she wanted to do was crawl into a hole and never come out.

As she began to undress, Julie’s eyes landed on her tattoo. It was a touch duller than it had been in her last Olympics, but the image was just as clear. The same would be true of her family’s tattoos. Commitment, Honor, Unity; Chu. Julie took a deep breath as she stared at her teammates. She had faced disappointment before. Losing in 2002 when they had been expected to win had been even worse because Julie had never experienced a loss quite like that. Cammi had helped her through, which is what had allowed Julie to thrive at Harvard. It was what had helped her assist her team in reaching the NCAA title game three years in a row. She had an obligation to Cammi to pay her kindness forward. More importantly she wanted to see these girls succeed. With that in mind, Julie stood up, called for her teammates’ attention, and relight the fire in their hearts.

Now they were about to step onto the ice and Julie was scared. She didn’t think she had ever been scared before a hockey game before. She may have settled her teammates, but she felt like there was little to gain and everything to lose. Julie was so lost in what could go wrong that she jumped when Angela shoulder bumped her.

“Ready to kick some ass, Chuey?” Angela asked.

“Yes?” Julie said. “I mean, yes.”

“Hey, if we’re going to play, we play to win,” Angela said. “Same plan we had at Harvard and you know how well that served us.” She shook the younger woman gently. “Loosen up, Julie.”

“Quit it, Rugger,” Julie laughed as she pushed the former Crimson Captain away. She was finally in the right mindset to play. “I promise I’ll do my best to help you complete your set.”

“If Chuey says she’ll do her best then I know I’m going home with a medal of every type,” Angela said with a nod. “Let’s play some hockey.”

Team USA hit the ice with a vengeance. Just after two and a half minutes of play Kelly scored a goal with an assist by Julie and Natalie on their first power play. After that Katie scored. Twice. Early in the second period Katie earned herself a hat trick with Julie’s second assist. By this point Julie was enjoying herself. All of that anger and frustration over their loss to Sweden flowed out of Julie into her shots and now she could just enjoy the hockey. They had a comfortable four point lead, which allowed the US to ease up and for Julie to remember a few things she had almost forgotten. Here she was representing her country in the Olympics playing for a medal and this was exciting. Hockey was fun.

With a minute and forty-four seconds left in the second period Finland pulled its goalie, a number 31 Räty, for their backup. Technically, Julie supposed Finland had started the game with their backup as Hassinen had actually started in more games and played more minutes than Räty. At least for the Olympics, Julie hadn’t paid that much attention to Finnish hockey. Julie thought that was an odd choice for their final Olympic game, but she didn’t know the interior politics behind the choices of the Finnish Women’s Olympic hockey team. The change in goalkeepers was a plus for Finland’s defense because Hassinen didn’t let in any of the US’s last nine shots. Chanda finished the game with her second shut out of the Olympics.

Julie was thrilled to end up in a puppy pile on the ice. It was four years later and for a different medal than expected, but she’d take it. Yes, technically third was worse than second place and a far cry from first, but at the moment it didn’t feel that way. Earning a medal was always more enjoyable than being handed one as a booby prize. Later Julie would feel sad and disappointed again. She’d work hard, finish her last year at Harvard, and then try to play professionally in hopes of getting another chance for the gold. Cammi only got two Olympics, but she also played for Team USA for eight years prior. Angela was on her third now and Julie was only twenty-three. In this moment of celebration as Julie proudly held up her bronze medal she was certain she’d reach the gold in 2010.

A few hours later Julie was happily watching Canada slaughter Sweden. She wasn’t really rooting for Canada because it was Canada, but Julie still felt a bit sore about the backstabbing. Alright, unexpected victory during the shoot out. Julie was grown up enough to admit they had played a good game. The hockey was still fun, even if she wasn’t playing, but Julie was starving. So she left the game right after Ouellette scored on Martin for sustenance.

Pretty quickly Julie found a gelato stand, which was exactly what one needed. After purchasing her treat, Julie looked around the eating area as she silently debated returning to finish watching the gold medal game. The decision was made for her when she spotted a girl in a blue Finnish jersey amidst the sea of red, white, and green. When she got closer Julie realized that it was personalized to say Räty 31.

“Are you a Raty fan?” Julie asked attempting to make pleasant conversation. She figured it couldn’t actually be Räty because she was so young looking in that oversized jersey.

“It is pronounced Rah-too,” she said. She offered Julie a seat. “And I am not a fan, but rather the goalie herself. However, most people call me ‘Noora’ instead of using my surname.”

“Oh,” Julie said, feeling silly. “You just look so young in that oversized… that’s your game jersey with the padding removed, isn’t it?”

Noora nodded. She leaned forward, looked at Julie’s chest, and said, “Chu? You were the one with two assists?”

“Yes,” Julie said, tapping her ID badge. “You’re much younger than I thought you would be. How old are you?”

“Sixteen,” Noora said flatly. “I was pulled from net thanks to that second goal you assisted.”

Julie let out her breath slowly and looked around. Perhaps this hadn’t been the best idea. She noticed a pile of damp and oddly shaped dry napkins near Noora. Julie’s heart swelled. She was a baby who had just lost her first Olympic medal match. Of course she was crushed. She should be with friends and family, not sitting alone at a gelato stand. Julie hoped Noora’s team didn’t blame her for their loss. A team’s loss was the same as a team’s win, shared equally by all.

“Where are you teammates?” Julie asked.

Noora’s lips pressed together so tightly they turned white. “Elsewhere.”

“You did really well,” Julie said gently. “It was a difficult game.”

“Maija did not allow any goals past,” Noora said. She sniffed loudly and turned her head away from Julie. Noora rubbed her sleeve against her face furiously for a moment before turning back to Julie.

“We weren’t playing as hard by the time your replacement went in,” Julie said. “She had an easier time than you did.”

“I was still pulled,” Noora said.

“How long have you been on the team?” Julie asked.

“Nearly a year,” Noora said. She brushed a finger under one of her red eyes. “I am an asset to my team. I got a shut out. I replaced Maija in the game against Canada.”

“That’s fantastic,” Julie said. “I bet your coach wanted you both to get experience against the traditionally most difficult teams. Pulling you was not a reflection of poor performance.”

“Finland will meet the United States again,” Noora said. “I will be in goal and I will beat you. I will shut you out. In Vancouver we will medal.”

“I look forward to seeing you try, Noora Räty,” Julie said with a grin. She clapped Noora on the shoulder. “Develop into the best goalie Finland has ever seen. We’ll play you anywhere, anytime, but I can promise you this, at the Vancouver Olympics in 2010 the US will be waiting for you in the gold medal match.”

Julie hoped her promise to Noora was truer than the one Cammi had made to her.

* * *

**—Feb 25th, 2010, Vancouver, Canada—**

Noora kept her promise piecemeal. Finland met the US multiple times a year, but the first time they walked away with a victory was during the 2008 IIHF Women’s World Championship at Harbin. Noora, had done exactly what Julie had asked of her and grown into a monster of a goalie. Not only did she lead Finland to victory she also shut out the US, as the only goal was by Pelttari after a hard 63 minutes and 42 seconds of play. Ultimately the US was the champion at the tournament, but Finland brought home the bronze. For herself Noora netted the honor of best goalie in the championship for the second year in a row and also the accolade of most valuable player. Julie couldn’t have been more proud. Not even if her little Finn had been playing for Team USA.

After their game Noora had come out to greet Julie, fiercely pleased with her own performance. Julie had been delighted to see her, though the fact she was in the middle of a pep talk with her youngest teammate made things a touch awkward. However, Noora barely seemed to notice Hilary Knight as she ripped off her gloves and brandished her right wrist at Julie. The older woman gently caught the wrist so that she could see it. Hilary’s obviously annoyance upon spotting Noora disappeared as she too bent over to look at the goalie’s wrist. In thick black cursive it said _‘Sisu.’_ Julie didn’t know what that meant, so she asked.

It was Finnish and Noora didn’t have an exact translation, but the closest English term was ‘having guts.’ Noora spent a while trying to explain the term properly. Julie eventually pieced together a definition that suited the Finn: _Sisu_ was the ability to sustain an action against the odds; deciding on a course of action and then sticking to that decision against repeated failures. Apparently Noora had gotten the tattoo the day after she returned to Finland from Turin. It was a constant reminder of her promise to Julie and Noora’s personal decision to aim for the top against all odds. Julie felt her heart swell as she listened to this strong quiet woman flush with victory’s glow, but still 100% determined to reach her goals.

Hilary started to laugh when Noora shot back Julie’s words from two years ago, but stopped when she realized Noora was serious. Only half the bargain was fulfilled, Noora still had to medal in Vancouver and she certainly planned on fighting the US in the gold medal round. Julie hoped Noora’s words were prophetic. Before parting ways Noora clasped her right hand to Julie’s and pressed their forearms together as a final reminder of their vow. Julie could almost feel Noora’s tattoo burn its way onto her own wrist. _Sisu_ was both a promise and a threat from Noora on behalf of Finland. They would be aiming just as high as the US and Canada. With Noora Räty Julie believed they could make it.

Noora had left quite the impression on Hilary. The young forward convinced the goalie to repeat the gesture she had just done with Julie on her. In Hilary’s case the words really did burn into her core. The already talented young woman grew into a different type of monster. Her name struck fear into the hearts of goalies everywhere. In the 2009 IIHF Women’s World Championship Hilary led the US to gold as that year’s tournament goal scoring leader with a total of seven goals. Combined with her two assists, Hilary ranked third overall for scoring leader, just behind Natalie with her three goals, seven assists, and Julie herself, who had five goals and five assists.

Julie didn’t even know where to begin describing the force of nature Hilary was on collegiate ice. As a sophomore she broke the University of Wisconsin Madison’s records for points, goals, and power-play goals in one season before leading her team to a NCAA Frozen Four victory, something Julie had never managed to accomplish.

To be fair Hilary had always been exceptional. She was the youngest player on Team USA when she joined in 2006 and stayed that way for several tournaments. Upon joining the national team Hilary chose to wear the number 21, Cammi’s number, with the specific intent to honor the former captain and the first Olympic team who brought home the gold. The only US team to earn gold medals. That in itself earned a place in Julie’s heart for Hilary Knight. To her surprise Hilary specifically sought out Julie and quickly established a relationship of respect and teasing; Hilary did most of the teasing. Julie had been an assistant coach for the University of Minnesota-Duluth and helped them to win an NCAA championship in 2008, but she never bonded with any of the girls quite like she had with Hilary. While she could always support her team with 100% of her ability, Julie found the greatest pleasure came from helping her favorite protégé succeed. Hilary was just special.

By the time they finally reached Vancouver Julie couldn’t tell which of her students had grown stronger. Neither girl wavered in their push toward the gold. Noora used her Olympic experience, almost supernatural skill, and raw _sisu_ to carry Finland into the semifinals, despite their loss to the US. Hilary had a much more jocular manner, but she was equally competitive, making five assists between the games against China and Russia. She then went on to drive home one of the six shots that slipped past Noora’s defenses out of a grand total of 42 in the game against Finland. Essentially that match had been Noora against the US as Finland had been unable to control the puck and unable to bypass Jessie Vetter on any of their 23 shots. She was so very proud of both of them.

Alas, the US and Finland’s destined gold medal match was not meant to be. Finland fell to Canada with a final score of 0-5. Noora played an even more valiant game against the Canadians than she had the US. Here she successfully warded off an impressive 45 of 50 shots, earning a save percentage of 0.90 while her teammates scrounged up a grand total of 11 shots. By the end of the first period Julie was in tears. It was just an endless volley of shots on Noora’s net and there was nothing Julie could do to help. All she could do was bear witness as Noora refused to give up. Refused to surrender. Hilary held Julie’s hand as they watched the slaughter.

Julie’s eyes met Hilary’s as the final whistle blew. They had already secured their spot in the gold medal match by defeating Sweden 9-1. They would avenge Noora by forcing a loss down Canada’s throat and in doing so Julie would finally earn gold for her country, her family, and her team. Together the Americans watched as their favorite Finn stalwartly stood through the end game handshake like the brave Nordic warrior she was. As she skated off the ice Julie knew Noora was down, but not defeated, not really. If nothing else Noora would come back stronger than ever trough sheer force of will. She certainly had enough of it.

Noora finished her promise to Julie in the bronze medal game. In Sweden Finland had found an equal adversary. For the first time in the Olympics one of Noora’s games went into overtime. The score was tied 2-2, with 21-18 shots, Finland’s favor. Finland controlled the puck in overtime. They shot, and shot, and scored! Thanks to Rantamaki Noora was able to step out of her net at 62:33 an Olympic medalist.

Julie and Hilary both leapt to their feet when Finland finally won. They hugged. Julie stayed standing and clapping as they passed out the bronze medals. Noora had her helmet off and a grin spread from ear to ear. Julie felt prouder of Noora than she had earning her own bronze last year, her only victory medal.

A puff of hot air hit Julie’s ear and then she could suddenly hear a familiar melody through the roar of the crowd.

“Julie Julie Chu, where are you? We’ve got some work to do now,” Hilary sang to the tune of the original Scooby Doo theme song. She reached out and brushed a hand across Julie’s cheeks. It was only then Julie realized she was crying. That seemed to happen a lot at the Olympics. “Come on, Julie Chu, I see you pretending you got a sliver. But you’re not fooling me cause I can see the way you shake and shiver.”

“Okay, I got it,” Julie laughed. She slung an arm around Hilary’s shoulders. “We’ve got our own game to win.”

Soon they were in the locker room with the rest of the US Women’s Olympic hockey team. Julie grinned as she rubbed her tattoo and recited the family motto. Commitment, Honor, Unity; Chu. Over the years it had become habit bordering on superstition to do so before every game. Julie always wanted to remember who she played for, her country, her family, her team. Even now Julie knew her parents were sitting in the stands waiting for her to get on the ice. She still desperately wanted to make them proud. Noora had honored her obligations. Julie had to take care of hers.

Natalie stepped forward and easily grasped everyone’s attention. The C looked good on her chest. Natalie made a great captain like Cammi had been. Julie was pleased to call her such. She really deserved it. Julie glanced down at her own chest to stare at the stitched on A. She had held positions of power before, but never on such a stage as the Olympics. It was such an unbelievable honor that her team had so much faith in her. Julie wouldn’t let them down.

Mark Johnson, their current coach, then stood up to talk to them. He had stepped up after Ben resigned. Julie was secretly grateful for that. It was wrong, but she had never forgiven him for cutting Cammi. She couldn’t respect a coach who didn’t respect the team. Julie grinned as she looked around the room at the twenty women she loved more than any one else in the world. They were already better than they had been in 2006. This time they were going to get the gold. Push Canada off its pedestal right in her own backyard. Julie could feel it in her bones. They were going to win this.

They took to the ice for warm ups. As Julie skated an initial circuit around the ice she searched the crowd for her family. Miriam and Wah had yet to miss a single Team USA event in which Julie participated. Her teammates often liked to joke that they usually arrived at the event even before the team. Hilary was an expert at spotting Julie’s parents in hotels, but on the ice Julie was the pro. After spotting them she raised her stick to them in acknowledgment. The Chus’ already excited cheering turned to a frenzy. As Julie lowered her stick her eyes drifted over the press box. She was startled to lock eyes with Cammi. Sure, Julie had known Cammi would be there—her mom had sent her an article clipping when it was announced Cammi would be a commentator for NBC, childhood hero-worship never died in the eyes of a parent—but the reality of it only hit now when Julie actually saw her. Cammi smiled and nodded at her, which is how Julie knew the former captain was proud of her the same way Julie was proud of Noora and Hilary. It felt so very right to see a girl you took under your wing thrive on the ice.

The game started out evenly. Canada and the US were often considered powerhouses of equal standing for a reason. Then, just a little after Canada killed a penalty half way through the first period, Poulin scored. Then a little bit later Hefford was put in the box for slashing. The US was unable to make anything of this power play in part because half a minute later Jinelle Zaugg-Siergie received a hooking penalty. Three seconds later Poulin scored again on the open ice. Those were two very hard blows, especially to have both been dealt by the same girl, but Julie knew they could rally and succeed. The moment Canada tripped or faltered would be the moment the US took control.

The only problem with this plan was that Canada never made a mistake. Oh sure, they still had girls sent to the box, but that didn’t seem to matter. They were experts on the penalty kill. Julie couldn’t believe her team had been unable to sink at least one puck into the net when Canada only had three players on the ice. Both Hefford and Kellar had gotten penalties that overlapped for delaying the game. Over a minute of 5 on 3 play and the US was unable to capitalize. Perhaps the worst part of this failure was that it sapped the US of their vigor. When the second period ended without a change in score Julie was shocked by how lethargic her teammates seemed. Hilary was still running at full steam, but she was the only one. Angela just seemed tired and Julie was suddenly reminded of the fact her former classmate was two years older than her. Natalie was also looking worn around the edges and that made Julie even more uncomfortable. Her captain was younger than Julie.

The only thing that happened in the third period was that they pulled Jessie ten seconds before the game ended. There was no way they could win, but at least they could avoid a shutout. Gold medal games always ended closely. Even with the extra attacker on the ice Szabados still got her shutout for Canada. The red and white uniforms turned into a happy swarm as per the usual victory celebration. Julie didn’t remember much else from the post-game ceremony. Just that her tears tasted bitter as the silver medal went around her neck.

Later she would learn that the Canadians celebrated by pouring wine and beer down each other’s throats while waving cigars in the air as they sat on the ice in the emptied arena. Julie did something similar. Only in her case she lay on a hotel bed with Angela, Natalie, Jenny, and Cammi passing around a bottle of scotch. They had shoved the two beds in the room together after Cammi showed up with the scotch to make enough room for the five women to share. Julie knew she ought to go and check on the younger girls, but before she had even left the locker room Molly Schaus and Brianne McLaughlin, the other goalkeepers, had begun comforting Jessie. Everyone else had split into little groups to mourn the loss in their own fashion. Angela invited Julie to join her in Natalie’s room and she agreed. However, she wanted to check on Hilary first, make certain she was handling her loss okay. When Julie went to look for her she found Hilary getting pulled away by the hand of another young woman. Julie realized it was Amanda Kessel, the last cut from the US Women’s Olympic hockey team. They were close, Hilary didn’t need Julie now. On the way back to the room they also invited Kerry Weiland and Molly Engstrom, the other team old timers, to join them, but they declined.

Now that she thought about it Julie was fine with it being just the five of them. That meant this was a captain’s drink, Angela and Jenny both wore the A alongside Julie, and she couldn’t think of a better way to commiserate their loss. Cammi passed Julie the bottle. It was half empty. Even split among five people that was still way more scotch than Julie was used to drinking. As she was about to press the rim of the bottle to her lips a thought occurred to Julie that made her giggle hard enough she had to set the bottle down. It clinked loudly against her silver medal as it rested on her chest.

“What’s so funny, Chuey?” Angela asked.

“Nothing,” Julie said. She had been about to indirectly kiss Cammi. As in Cammi Granato, the most fantastic women’s hockey player in history. Julie couldn’t believe she was lying on a bed next to her.

“Then hurry up and pass the bottle,” Angela said. “I can still remember that little snot’s face.” Julie took a quick swig and passed her the bottle. She didn’t mind if Angela indirectly kissed her. Besides, teammates shared everything.

“Marie-Phillip Poulin or Shannon Szabados?” Natalie asked.

“Both,” Angela grunted. Everyone laughed.

Julie’s giggles died out slowly. She couldn’t stop herself from rapidly glancing back and forth between Cammi and Angela. These were the two women aside from her mother she had looked up to the most while growing up. Cammi had been an unobtainable goal to be looked upon from afar, while Angela had been so close, unbearably close, and yet never within reach. Julie loved both these women so much. All the women in this room made her knees go weak. So what if they lost? She had the best teammates in the world.

“This is my last Olympics,” Jenny said.

“What? Why?” Julie stammered. She struggled to sit up and look at the alternate captain, but couldn’t quite manage it.

“Take your pick of reasons. At 31 I’m the oldest team member now and I’ll be even older in four years. My skill isn’t what it once was either. I was terrible against Finland and terrible today,” Jenny said. She accepted the bottle and took a pull. “More importantly, I’m a mom. I’ve missed vast swaths of Madison’s life and I’m doing the same to Cullen. It’s not fair to them and it’s not fair to my Rob.”

Julie looked down at her hands. She felt ashamed. Jenny was her only teammate with children and that had to be a stressor. She should have done a better job of checking on her to make sure everything was okay. Kids changed everything. Just look at what her parents had given up to make Julie’s dreams come true.

“So you’re hanging up your skates?” Natalie asked.

“Not yet, but I will well before Sochi,” Jenny said. “I still have another year, maybe two, of international level skating left in me.”

“Then we’re in the same boat,” Natalie laughed.

“What? But aren’t you the baby in this bed?” Cammi said.

“Don’t you dare repeat this to anyone, but the only reason I quit my gig as Assistant Coach at the U of M is that I wanted one last shot at the gold. I promised myself I’d put my all in and if I didn’t make it, it was time to stop,” Natalie said. “I loved teaching my Gophers. Honestly, helping them succeed is just as fulfilling as winning myself these days and it’s easier on my bank account.”

“I hate ramen,” Angela said. She reached over and plucked the bottle out of Natalie’s hands. “Sorry Cammi, I’ll give you it in a sec, but I have a toast to make. To Chuey! May you represent the lot of us at Sochi and bring the gold home for America!”

“You’re quitting too, Rugger?” Julie wailed. This was the worst captain’s drink ever.

“I would never quit on you, Julie,” Angela said as she wrapped an arm around the forward. “I’ve played with you on my team longer than anyone else in my life. You’re… you’re my rock and I will always have your back. But I’m feeling awfully long in the tooth like the others at the moment. Maybe I’ll make it to Sochi, but I’ve got nothing to prove. I already have gold.”

“I’ll miss you,” Julie whispered.

“I’ll be in the stands cheering for you. We’ll all cheer for you,” Angela said. She pressed the bottle into Julie’s hands. “So take a drink if you’re gonna do it. You’d look good in gold. Or are you crapping out like the rest of us?”

The bottle flew to Julie’s lips as she tilted her head back to chug. Quickly though some of the scotch went down the wrong pipe and Julie sprayed herself with a mouthful of alcohol. Cammi sat up and helped pound Julie’s back as she coughed. When it appeared she could breathe again Angela leaned forward and kissed Julie’s temple.

“Never,” Julie coughed. “I’ll never quit.”

* * *

**—Feb 20th, 2014, Sochi, Russia—**

Julie was really tired of the reporters focusing on her age. The first question out of their mouths was always how did she feel being the oldest player on the women’s Olympic team? Usually followed by them shoehorning in the fact she was four years older than the next oldest player—and for the record Jessie was only three years and nine months younger than Julie—and then asking if that made it hard to relate to the younger players or if she ever felt isolated due to her age. It didn’t. Yes, Hilary or the Lamoureux twins called her mom or grandma sometimes, but that was always after Julie had been mothering them overly much or getting down on herself for her age. Not a single one of her teammates ever gave her a tough time over her age. Not once. They certainly never suggested she shouldn’t be on the team because of it either. The reporters had.

The nicer ones had been certain she would have a place on the Olympic team. She was Julie Chu after all. She had captained the National Team for two years. To those reporters she would gently point out that no Olympic spot was ever guaranteed, just look at Cammi Granato who had captained the team less than three hundred days before the Olympics in 2006. She was sweet to these reporters because Julie knew they meant well. She just said nothing and smiled politely when the nastier ones told her she was too old and should hang up her skates to let some fresh blood onto the team. Julie didn’t have to justify herself to them. As long as she felt good enough and the coaches felt she played well enough Julie would play. That’s all that mattered.

Julie didn’t actually mind talking to reporters; she just wished they would vary their questions more. While perhaps a little dated they could ask about her time playing for the Minnesota Whitecaps. She was with the team for three seasons and won the Clarkson Cup in 2010, where she was also named the tournament’s most valuable player. Or if that was too old they could ask about her move to the Montreal Stars, winning the Clarkson Cup again in 2011 making her the only person around to win it twice in a row on two different teams. Heck, she still played with the Stars and some of her teammates would be on Canada’s Olympic team so Julie assumed that could be a fascinating angle to cover. Her best friend and teammate, Caroline Ouellette, was to be captain of Team Canada. Julie would be delighted to discuss the challenges of playing forward vs. defense, as she played both for the Stars and probably had better insight to it than most of her teammates. She was even willing to talk about coaching at Union College for two seasons.

Julie could get some reporters to talk about these things and had lovely interviews with them. But there were others who didn’t take the bait and just plowed ahead on the subject of Team USA. Those were the ones Julie found didn’t care about the CWHL or women’s hockey. Not beyond the narrow point of it being an Olympic sport. The most frustrating part though, was that even the best reporters eventually ended on another age question. They all wanted to know if she’d play again in the 2018 Olympics. Julie’s answer was always the same: she didn’t know.

At least her teammates were fantastic. Hockey teams were always close, but Julie especially felt kinship to these girls. Maybe it was just because she was old and worried that this Olympics was her last, but Julie really did like the ‘mom’ and ‘grandma’ nicknames. It defined her place on the team more, which was something Julie felt had been lacking after she gave up the C to Meghan Duggan. Meghan certainly deserved it, but it had still hurt to hand back the C that fall. Still, she’d support her team however she could and if that meant playing on the fourth line she would. Coach Katie Stone had specifically kept Julie on the team for penalty kills; especially against Team Canada as Julie was the person with the most experience playing with or against its players.

They supported her too. Brianne McLaughlin taught Julie and a dozen other girls how to crochet on a bus ride. It was a great stress reliever and Julie found herself crocheting all the time. Hilary had asked her to make a finger sock with a mustache, but there was no way Julie would do that. Hilary caused enough trouble with her pranks without a finger puppet to blame. Everyone on the team was her extended family, which was why Julie felt Commitment, Honor, Unity was even more important to everyone both Chu and otherwise than ever.

Sochi was different and yet in many ways the same as previous Olympics. This year she was rooming with Molly, Hilary, and unexpectedly Brianne. One of them had brought along an Apple TV, which they set up in their room. This turned their space into the hangout place for the US Women’s Olympic hockey team. Sometimes one of the girls brought a friend along, but it was mostly just Julie’s team. That was probably Julie’s favorite lazy off time activity. They watched Grey’s Anatomy and all of the figure skating together. It was important team bonding. They were so thrilled when Meryl Davis and Charlie White received gold for ice dancing. The team even had a small party in the room.

This year the US Women’s Olympic hockey team skipped the opening ceremonies. Officially it was because of the early game against Finland the next day and not because of any opening ceremony uniform issues. That was mostly true. Julie thought Finland might have the same plan in mind, but she wasn’t certain. Unofficially though, there hadn’t been any mourning from the team on missing the ceremonies. The blazers were vile. They looked like something someone’s blind grandmother had stitched together out of an old American themed crazy quilt. Julie had been lucky enough to be chosen as a model for the uniform, so there were already hundreds of photos of her out there in it. She wouldn’t have minded more. The others felt differently. Also, customs had confiscated some of their boots, which would have been a problem if they had gone. Hilary and some of the other girls decided to have their own make believe opening ceremonies, though Hilary was the only one sans pants. Brianne took a photo and posted it online where it blew up. Julie couldn’t remember the last time she had laughed so much.

The tournament was set up a little bit different this year. Unlike in the past where only the top two teams from each group moved on, this time everyone in Group A automatically moved on no matter how they did in the preliminary matches and only the top two from Group B would continue to the quarter-finals. The top two teams from Group A would get automatic byes into the semifinals. Setting things up this way was an attempt to allow some of the traditionally weaker teams to get farther in the Olympics. 

The US easily received a bye to the semifinals, which surprised no one. Hilary made the fastest opening goal in Olympic history for Women’s hockey just 53 seconds into the US’s 3-1 victory over Finland. Noora was the only reason Hilary didn’t get more than a goal and an assist that game. Her save percentages were always phenomenal. The US then went on to crush Switzerland 9-0 before suffering a painful loss to Canada. The loss was annoying, especially after the US had bested Canada in all the exhibition games starting in December—including the two that turned into line brawls; the one in North Dakota that was aired on national television was especially memorable, and Julie now knew better than to ever mess with either Lamoureux twin—but it did not effect their progression in the games. They had already won their bye. So it wasn’t an important match against Canada, but it still hurt. Julie used the loss as more fuel to play better. She encouraged the others to do the same. That was about all Julie could do, she had only been on the ice six minutes and twenty-three seconds in that game. At least Julie saw Hilary and Amanda take her words to heart.

It wasn’t a total upset to the world when Sweden bested Finland, but it was a shock to Julie. Finland had been predicted to take bronze again. The game ended 4-2, with shots 32-31, both in Sweden’s favor. Midway through second period Hovi scored Finland a lead. Games between Finns and Swedes are always hostile affairs—Julie did not understand much of the situation, but she knew the animosity went back centuries. The end of second period had a scrum that resulted in 3 on 3 hockey. Everything fell apart in the third period. Sweden scored on a power play leftover from the last period and then again at equal strength to pull ahead. However, Finland was able to tie it the game 12 seconds later. The game-winning goal came during another Swedish power play, this time a slap shot from the blue line. Noora never even saw the puck. Finland called an immediate timeout and Noora was pulled from goal three minutes later. She was restored to the net with three seconds left in the game after Sweden had an empty netter at 59:19. Others might wonder why Finland bothered putting her back in the game with only three seconds left, but Julie understood. Win or lose Noora wanted to finish the game on the ice with her team.

Finland’s lost chance to medal preceded an even greater loss to the world of hockey: Noora Räty. On February 16th, the morning after their loss, Noora announced she was retiring from hockey. Specifically women’s hockey, but it would be from hockey overall if no professional men’s team was willing to pay her to play. She wrote that she had meant to save this announcement for after the Olympics, but she felt so disheartened she decided to reveal it now. Noora Räty was the best female goalie in the world, quite possibly the best goalie period, and she was retiring at 24.

If the world allowed someone as incredibly talented as Noora Räty retire before she had even reached her peak there was something irrevocably broken about it. It was a heartbroken Julie filled with a surprising amount of rage that tracked down Noora later that day. Someone had to stop Noora from making the worst mistake of her life and it appeared the obligation on Julie. She had taken Noora under her wing eight years ago with the intent to develop her into the best that she could be. Noora had at least two more Olympics in her, possibly even three as goalies tended to last longer than other hockey players. Julie would be doing the greatest disservice imaginable to everyone and everything she stood for if she allowed Noora to make a decision the Finn would regret for the rest of her life.

Julie found the goalie in the last place she would have suspected, her hotel room. This was after tearing through Olympic Village looking for the Finn. Julie had assumed she could catch Noora after the goalie’s 2-1 victory over Germany that afternoon. Noora was sitting on yoga mats on the floor with Hilary, Amanda, and a Finnish girl Julie didn’t recognize. They all stopped watching the TV the moment Julie came into the room.

“Hey, Chuey, are you okay?” Hilary asked. “You don’t look so hot.”

“Noora,” Julie said, ignoring Hilary. “What possessed you to make such an announcement this morning? You are not quitting hockey.”

“You are right,” Noora said. “I am quitting women’s hockey. That is very different from quitting hockey.”

“Why? Women’s hockey is just as good, if not better than men’s hockey,” Julie said. “At least for goalies! The skills you need to face me, or Hilary, or Caroline Ouellette are far higher than the ones needed to face any NHL player! All they have is power!”

“Don’t you think I know that? I have played the highest level of skilled hockey in the world. I am Finland’s finest goalie and could develop into the best goalie in the world. But as things stand hockey can’t feed me. Hockey can’t pay my car bills. Hockey can’t pay my rent. Who will pay for those things?” Noora was on her feet now and she looked almost as angry as Julie felt. “Will someone take care of me and pay all my bills? No! I have to! Me and only me!”

“Then get a job! You managed just fine over the last year. Or find a sponsorship, like how I have Bounty.”

“I have a job with MEGA Goaltending and the last year of coaching while maintaining an Olympic level body is unsustainable. Most of my rests came from naps between work and practice. It was never enough. I nearly burned out several times. This situation lasted only a year. I cannot imagine struggling through four more years of it,” Noora said. “I cannot live hand-to-mouth nor should I have to do so. As for your sponsorship idea, Finnish companies are not like American ones. And none of the American ones will support a foreigner, not for women’s hockey. Your own deal is only due to the Olympics. If I am to maintain a hockey ready body I must play competitive professional hockey. Yes, I could play in the professional Russian women’s league, like Mira, but it’s not competitive enough. Not for me.”

“Then join the CWHL, we’re plenty competitive and we’re the professional league of North America,” Julie said. “You didn’t even mention us in your retirement letter.” Julie was less angry than she had been. Noora had made some excellent points and Julie couldn’t deny the truth of them. Since the anger had mostly burned away Julie was just left with a permeating sadness.

“I specifically did not mention them because in my definition of the word ‘professional’ the players are actually paid,” Noora said dryly. “Compensation for the gear and the league paying for ice time does not negate the need for every player to have a full time job.”

“We’re hoping to be able to pay the players within the next five years,” Julie said meekly.

“I cannot wait five years,” Noora said. “Unless a professional men’s team picks me up I will not be going to Pyeong Chang.”

Somehow that last statement was too much for Julie. She burst into tears. In an instant Hilary was up and by her side. Her attempts to comfort the older woman were ineffective as big fat tears kept streaming down Julie’s face. There was just so much pain in Julie’s chest. Most of it wasn’t even about Noora, but the Finn had been key to unlocking the hurt. Everything Noora had said applied to women across the globe, and many weren’t even playing hockey. People didn’t support their female athletes the way they did their male. That meant the Olympics was the peak of women’s sports, the only peak outside of college, and that was wrong. Almost as wrong as Noora not playing in 2018. Or Julie for that matter.

“You have to go to Pyeong Chang because I can’t. I need you and Hilary there because if you weren’t it would be wrong and things will already be wrong enough because I’ll be too old. I’m already too old and everyone knows it, but they’re humoring me anyway. Cammi didn’t get that courtesy, but she was still fantastic at 34 and led us to gold at the IIHF Women’s World Championship!” Julie wailed. “She was cut for no reason! I have contributed nothing to my team and my lose won’t matter, but you… you are the backbone of Finland!”

“You have contributed lots,” Hilary insisted. “Maybe not so much on the ice anymore, but you’re our team’s leader. Everyone looks up to you. Chuey, you’re my example on how an athlete, no a person, should act. You wouldn’t be on the team if you weren’t good enough. You are anything but useless.”

“Neither one of you can just quit,” Julie mumbled. She leaned against Hilary.

“I’m not, I swear I’m not,” Hilary said.

There was a quick back and forth in Finnish before Noora stepped past the tall girl and wrapped her arms around Julie. While Hilary’s hold was gentle, Noora’s was similar to a bear. Between the short Finn and the tall American Julie felt secure. Her girls grounded her.

“I am not quitting either,” Noora said. “I am taking a gamble that I believe I will win.”

“How?” Julie asked.

“I have told the world I wish to play for a paying men’s league and will not play otherwise. The world wishes to see me play. It’s bragging, but I am that good,” Noora said with a shrug. “A men’s team will take me and I will bring them victory. If this does not happen naturally I will make it happen.”

“I believe you,” laughed Hilary.

“This will happen and I will remain a goalie,” Noora said. She reached up and touched Julie’s cheek. “If that is the case I will be at the 2018 Olympics. As will Hilary. And you too, Julie. You may not play, but it is not an Olympics without you, Julie Chu.”

Julie had almost gotten her tears under control until Noora spoke. It set off the waterworks again. Here she was playing on the best team in the world against the best opponents imaginable and she was grateful to be here. Instead of chewing her out like they ought to, Hilary and Noora were comforting Julie to their best of their ability. Julie didn’t deserve friends like these, but she was thankful for them nonetheless. She was so very blessed.

“Amanda, Mira, I believe we shall have to hang out another time,” Noora said. She patted Julie’s shoulder. “Hilary and I are needed here.”

“Noora,” said the tall girl in a warning tone. It seemed like this was Mira.

“I am perfectly safe here,” Noora said.

“Yeah, Chuey’s just a big teddy bear,” Hilary said. “She’d never hurt a fly. If anyone tries anything on Noora, I’ll protect her, even if she is a Gopher.”

“Like I would need your protection,” Noora laughed.

“Come one, Mira,” Amanda said, grabbing the girl’s arm. “Let’s go. We need to talk to Megan, Gigi, and Anne anyway. Oh, and I want to introduce you to Lee.” Amanda carefully guided Mira out of the room, though both Gophers glanced back at Julie as they made their exit.

Hilary and Noora guided Julie to her bed. They then maneuvered Hilary’s bed so that it was flush with Julie’s bed. Then the girls crawled into it with Julie, pausing only long enough to rid themselves and Julie of their shoes. Julie ended up in the middle with a girl on either side holding her tight. When she woke Brianne and Jessie were in the room. They said nothing about the sleeping arrangements, just that it was almost time for dinner and asked if she would wake Hilary. Julie was grateful. She woke both of the girls and apologized for her shameful behavior. Hilary laughed it off and Noora said it was nothing. Noora ate dinner with Julie then returned to her teammates for dessert. Julie was relieved there was no tension between her and the goalie. Noora had understood.

The next day the US defeated Sweden 6-1. They rained down shots on Sweden, barely allowing the other team to touch the puck. Julie was on the ice for just over 12 minutes, mostly in the third period. She didn’t make any goals or assists, but she kept Sweden from doing the same while the top lines rested. That was her role now and that was enough. Canada bested Switzerland a few hours later 3-1. The medal matches were set. Julie was ready for her last shot at gold.

It was a pleasant surprise when Switzerland beat Sweden in the bronze medal match. Sweden had dominated the first period, only allowing the Swiss one shot on goal. At the beginning of the third period it was 2-0 Sweden’s favor. However Switzerland seemed to wake up in the third period. They made three unanswered goals before Sweden pulled their goalie. Both teams scored before the goaltender was put back in and Switzerland won, 4-3. Julie wasn’t invested in the game, but she was pleased to see Switzerland win. They had never medaled in women’s hockey. The fact the Swedes had fallen after beating Noora was just an added bonus.

Then it was time for what was likely Julie’s last Olympic match. The locker room right before the game was buzzing with energy. A lot of the team had been to Vancouver and had suffered at the hands of Canada. They were ready for payback. Those who hadn’t felt a medal loss were of the opinion that the sting of earlier this week was enough. They played to win after all.

Julie had just finished her usual routine and was dressed to hit the ice. She looked around to see if anyone needed help. Amanda had Megan Bozek drawing an arrow on her hand. The twins were engaged in their usual light bickering as they laced up their skates. Everyone else looked pretty much ready to go. An arm draped across Julie’s shoulders and Julie suddenly found herself under the weight of the one and only Hilary Knight. Hilary’s lips were close enough to Julie’s ear that they brushed against it as she sang.

“Julie Chu be ready for your act, don’t hold back!” Hilary sang quite loudly, but on key as she drew the team’s attention. “And Julie Chu if you came through you’re gonna have yourself a Julie snack! That’s a fact!”

“I think she’d rather have a gold medal,” Gigi Marvin drawled.

“I think we all would,” Julie laughed. She tried to shrug off Hilary, but the taller woman just clung to her tighter.

“I dunno, a Julie snack sounds pretty good right now,” Hilary said as she waggled her eyebrows at Julie. “We’ll have to try one after we bag our gold medal, eh Chuey?” Julie laughed even harder at this and successfully pushed Hilary off. Hilary could clown around at even the tensest of moments and Julie loved that about her.

“Right then, let’s win this one for Julie, “ Meghan said. “I don’t know about snacks, but there’s no one around who deserves gold more.”

They hit the ice and sped through warm ups. After the pucks were swept up the team huddled together around their net for one last rally. All teams did this as one last chance to get the players’ heads in the game and Team USA was no exception. As captain, Meghan said a few inspiring words before starting the cheer. Instead of one of their usual ones, like ‘let’s do it,’ ‘get it done,’ or even the good ole ‘U S A,’ this was a new one. This time the team shouted ‘do it for Chuey!’ Julie didn’t know whether to be embarrassed or proud. She had the best team in the world.

The game started out fast and physical. Both teams threw a lot of hits as they had all season. They were fairly evenly matched for shots and penalties, though Canada had just a little more of the latter, the US the former. Julie had never once forgotten how good Canada was, she had two silver medals to prove it, but it was always a reminder to play them. All of their players were amazing and their goalie simply fantastic. Halfway through second period Meghan scored with an assist from Jocelyne Lamoureux. Julie had been an effective screen for the goal. Canada was understandably unhappy about it, but unable to do anything, despite the fact the US had two more penalties that period. This included a 5 on 3 situation against the US. Julie and the twins kept them from scoring. The Canadians were still pretty unhappy even after the intermission, which is what lead to the penalty at the beginning of the third period that allowed Alex Carpenter to score with assists by Hilary and Kelli Stack.

When there was only five minutes left on the clock Julie dared to believe they could win this. Sure, she always said that they would win and worked as hard as possible to achieve that goal, but now she felt hope in her chest for the first time in all of the 2014 Olympics. This wasn’t Vancouver, or Turin, or even Salt Lake City. They were ahead by two and at this rate Jessie could even get a shutout. That would be gratifying for their goalie as Canada had Szabados in net again. Julie had always liked the idea of reflecting the score of their last gold medal loss onto Canada, it seemed poetic to her.

They always say a two-goal lead is the most dangerous in hockey. Players stop moving aggressively and begin playing defensively in an attempt to protect their lead instead of extending it. They get complacent. That’s not what happened to the US Women’s Olympic hockey team. They continued to press just as aggressively as ever for that next goal. Hilary clearly wanted more than just an assist in the gold medal match. However, Jenner scored for Canada with 3:26 left on the clock. It had started out as a simple shot on net, a no brainer for Jessie, but then it deflected off Kacey Bellamy’s knee, as she was too well positioned for defense, and arched unexpectedly into the net over Jessie’s arm. 

As Julie took to the ice on her line change she caught sight of Kacey coming off the ice. She was crying and doubled over as soon as she sat down on the bench. It was obvious Kacey felt the goal was her fault. If she had been a second slower the puck would have passed her by and safely landed in Jessie’s glove. It wasn’t her fault. She had simply been too good at her job, which combined with the unpredictability of the puck skittering across the ice resulted in a goal. Julie would do everything in her power to see this incident didn’t haunt the young defense player. The simplest way to do that would be for the US to win. So that’s what Julie would do.

Szabados was pulled with 1:35 left on the clock. Canada was still down by one and they hoped to tie things up with the extra attacker. There was a faceoff to Jessie’s right and suddenly the puck was flying toward Canada’s empty net. Hilary and a Canadian chased after it, but neither one of them would catch it in time. With a surprisingly loud clink it bounced off a goal post. Canada called a timeout. When the timeout came to an end Julie hit the ice with her line mates. Technically they were playing at even strength, but Canada’s extra attacker made it seem like a penalty kill, which was why Coach Stone wanted Julie on the ice. There was 1:14 left in the game. She couldn’t let them down. The US was finally going to reclaim the gold.

Julie tried to keep the puck out of Canadian hands. She was the last defense before Jessie during the faceoff. The puck slid behind the net with Gigi dashing after it. Gigi slapped it along the boards toward Julie. She reached it the same time as Poulin did and it flew into the corner, followed by Kelli and Kacey. The puck bounced across the rink, soaring over the crease. Julie raced after it and slammed into Ward to keep her from the puck. However, the puck got loose, hit the back of the rink and soared to right in front of the crease where Poulin was able to scoop it up and toss it over Jessie into the net. With 55 seconds left on the clock the same girl who had destroyed the US’s chances at Vancouver by scoring all the gold medal game goals had tied the 2014 gold medal game for Canada. Julie felt sick.

Obviously Canada put Szabados back in net. They were angling to finish this in overtime. They got their wish. Team USA was in dire spirits as they entered the locker room. Julie tried to cheer the others up, point out that they had scored first in the game and would also score first in overtime. She didn’t buy it and Julie was pretty certain the others didn’t buy it either. How had she let that puck slip through her grasp? The goal was Julie’s fault because she hadn’t properly controlled the puck when she took out Ward. When she was younger Julie was certain she could have managed both. Her age may have just cost them the gold medal. Coach Stone stood to talk to them. Julie paid attention to the best of her ability as she explained the strategy. It was difficult though because all Julie could concentration on was not screwing up again. They had twenty minutes of sudden death overtime ahead of them. They were going to win this.

Overtime was four on four, which opened up a lot of ice. Hilary and the rest of the team threw shot after shot at Szabados in the first minute. Then it became something of a back and forth with eight players racing across the ice. All of the carefully built lines were ripped apart with new pairs stuck together to see what worked. Gigi crashed into Jessie and the net. Fortunately the other three on the ice were able to keep Canada distracted while they untangled themselves. Canada was so much livelier on the ice now. Six minutes in Anne Schleper went for the kill, but Ward body slammed her to the ground. Canada got a penalty for that. A moment later Jocelyne got a penalty for slashing. She barely touched Szabados’s pads. Coach Stone looked like she was about to have a conniption. It was 3 on 3 hockey. 

Wickenheiser made a breakaway toward the US net. There wasn’t anyone to stop her. Hilary chased after her, almost caught her, then slipped and fell. On her way down she must have bumped Wickenheiser because she too fell, which was the only reason Jessie was able to easily deflect the shot. Hilary got a penalty for cross-checking. Canada’s coach screamed for a penalty shot, while Julie’s own coach couldn’t believe what was happening. Coach Stone asked about Jocelyne’s slashing penalty, as that still didn’t seem right since Jocelyne hadn’t realized play had stopped.

Hilary’s penalty was delayed because it was impossible to play hockey with only two skaters on the ice, which put Julie back on the ice. They had to kill the penalty somehow. The Canadians surrounded them. Julie tried to get the puck out of their zone, but she couldn’t handle three opponents on her own. They passed back and forth while Julie tried to intercept without letting them get by her. To her horror, Julie felt her knee give out from under her and she fell on it. 

That was when Canada decided to pass. She tried to get in the way as the pass started, but the puck slipped by unhindered. Right to Poulin’s stick. She swung. The puck flew so quickly Julie didn’t catch sight of it again until it was sliding back out of the net behind Jessie. Poulin had scored. For the second Olympics in a row Marie-Phillip Poulin scored the game-winning goal. Poulin had taken Julie’s gold again and it was all Julie’s fault.

Julie wanted to block out Canada’s celebration like she had for the last two Olympics, but she couldn’t. This was her last game on such hallowed ice. Even if this was another defeat Julie refused to forget a single second of it. There were a lot of tears on both sides of the rink. Poulin was being hailed as a golden gold medalist. Julie thought she ought to feel anger at the younger girl for winning yet again, but all she felt was emptiness inside. All of the younger girls on Team USA were crying, which meant that as the oldest—as the reporters had been so fond of pointing out—Julie was the only dry eyed one in line. She even reached up to feel her cheeks, surprised to find them dry, as normally she would be sobbing like everyone else. Julie always seemed to be crying at the Olympics. Most of the girls were able to get their emotions under control after their silver medals and bouquets had been awarded. They had lost, but they had still medaled and weren’t done representing America. Julie stood stoically to the left of her captain as Canada’s national anthem played. Meghan looked as if she would burst into tears again and Julie knew she had to be there for support. That was the least she could do.

After they were off the ice and out of the locker room Julie knew she ought to check on her teammates. The first timers especially would need the moral support and Julie didn’t think Meghan was up to it at the moment. She’d check in with Hilary first and Amanda first, see what the girls were feeling and if they had any sense on who needed help the most. They would know and might even be willing to talk to anyone Julie couldn’t reach right away. She also liked the fact this plan would give her a chance to check on Hilary and Amanda herself; both girls liked to hide their hurt behind strong defenses.

Julie’s plans to care for her team derailed the minute she left the locker room. She had barely gotten down the hall when she heard a very familiar voice calling out her name. It froze her in her tracks.

“Julie,” Caroline called out, laughing. “Too busy to say hello?”

“Oh no, hey Caro,” Julie said. She slowly turned around. Normally Caroline was her favorite person in the world to see, but now was not normal. Now they weren’t playing for the Stars together, they were representing their countries and Caroline’s had just handed Julie’s a crushing defeat. The gold medal around her neck was proof of that. She tried to look at Caroline’s face, but the medal on her chest drew Julie’s eyes. It was just below Caroline’s C and kept reflecting the hall lights.

“That was an amazing game, Chuey,” Caroline said. “I can’t believe we came back from trailing 2-0…” The Canadian trailed off as her mind caught up with her words. Caroline’s eyes zeroed in on the medal around Julie’s neck, which was still silver. Julie didn’t fault her for her behavior; she’d be just as giddy and excited to share with Caroline if she had been the one to win. Nonetheless, it was painful to be the loser in this scenario. “…Julie.”

“It’s okay, Caroline,” Julie said. She could feel the edge in her voice and that was the last thing she wanted to inflict on Caroline. She was her best friend and normally her teammate. She wanted to be able to share in Caroline’s joy. “You should be celebrating. It was an impressive comeback.”

“You were on fire out there, Julie,” Caroline said softly. “You stopped shot after shot and really hampered us.”

“I let two goals in,” Julie said flatly. “The two goals that cost us the game.”

“That was all Marie, not you,” Caroline said firmly. “America dominated just now and ninety-nine times out of a hundred you would have won.”

“Yeah,” Julie agreed.

She plastered the largest grin onto her face she could muster. It was fake and Caroline could tell it was fake, but it was the best she could manage. Julie’s eyes had turned into slits she could barely see through in an attempt to hold back the tears. She hadn’t felt the urge to cry on the ice, but now she did. Normally it would be fine for Julie to cry in front of Caroline. She would encourage it even, after the Stars lost and they were both frustrated, wrapping her arms around Julie until the hurt had all been cried out. But this was the least normal time of the last four years and the last thing Julie could allow was Caroline seeing her weakness. As the loser she could not accept sympathy from the victor. In her gut Julie knew it would worsen the experience when the loss was so raw. She wondered if this was how Noora felt when she talked to her after the bronze medal game in Turin.

“Chuey?” Caroline asked.

“My team was amazing,” Julie choked out. She turned and ran down the hall before she could lose her composure in front of Caroline. The last thing she wanted was a hug from Caroline.

For the first time in her life Julie Chu shirked her responsibilities. She needed to be alone. She needed to mourn the end of her Olympian career. Most importantly Julie needed to accept the fact she had cost four US Olympic women’s hockey teams the gold medal and broke her most important promise to her mother. Obviously she hadn’t followed the family motto well enough. She hadn’t been enough.

Miriam tracked Julie down to find her sitting on an out of the way park bench at the edge of Olympic Village. It wasn’t until Julie saw her mother sit down beside her that Julie finally burst into tears. Without a word Miriam wrapped her arms around her younger daughter and pulled the woman’s head to her chest. Miriam held Julie tighter than she had in years.

Julie was shocked when she was chosen as flag bearer for the US during the closing ceremonies. There were so many strong and amazing people among the US delegation that Julie couldn’t believe they had chosen her to represent her country. Especially after her performance during the Olympics. All of the Olympics. They told her she had been selected because she embodied everything the America stood for and the spirit of the Olympics, but that wasn’t true because the Olympics were about all of them, the journey they had faced, and the bonds that had developed. Even if Julie had won gold this was the greatest honor the Olympics ever could have bestowed upon her. Cammi was the only other hockey player to have carried the flag. It was with love and pride in her heart that Julie carried the stars and stripes during the closing ceremonies.

Julie didn’t come to terms with her loss until later. She was sitting in a coffee shop at an international airport, not in Russia, but in the US on her way to Mexico. She had already been home and was now on her way to meet the rest of her team for a well-earned vacation. Julie didn’t remember who came up with the plan, but she suspected Hilary had a hand in it. Julie had been finishing up her cup of coffee and toying with the idea of ordering a second one when the waitress dropped off another drink in front of her.

“Excuse me, but I didn’t order this,” Julie said.

“No, but those girls over there did on your behalf,” the waitress said, pointing at another table. “I guess you have some fans.”

Julie didn’t respond because she was too busy staring at the other table. There were two teenage girls anxiously staring at her. One girl looked Caucasian, the other Asian. They were both in USA Olympic gear. The Asian girl had what had to be a kindergartener sitting next to her clutching a Sochi bear. They obviously recognized Julie. So she picked up the coffee and her backpack before walking over to them.

“You’re Julie Chu,” said one of the teens in awe.

“The best women’s hockey player ever,” the other squeaked. Both of sets of eyes were shining.

“I don’t know about that second claim because I have met so many amazing hockey players over the years,” Julie laughed, “but yes, I’m Julie Chu.”

“We watched all of your games,” said the first girl. She looked a little like Molly to Julie. “It was so wrong when they called that last penalty on Hilary Knight in the gold medal match. You were fantastic!”

“It’s not our place to argue with the referees and what’s done is done. Time to move on,” Julie said. She smiled at the girls, worried she had sounded too harsh. “Thank you for all the support. We would never have made it as far as we did without fans like you.”

“Our whole team watched the final game together,” the other team said. She seemed quieter than her friend. “We’re on the hockey team together.”

“We’re only freshmen, but next year we’re gonna make it onto the team properly and help win a lot of games,” said the Molly look alike.

“That’s fantastic, what position do you two play?” Julie asked. They grinned at each other before saying ‘defense’ in unison.

“We’ve been d-partners on every team we’ve been on since the start of middle school,” said the Molly look alike. “Though now we’re also having to teach Lucy’s little sister how to skate.”

Julie smiled at the little girl. She stared back wide-eyed before announcing that Julie had been on TV. Then she hid her face in her bear. Lucy wrapped an arm around her sister as her face turned pink. She seemed embarrassed about her sister’s behavior.

“She’s shy,” Lucy apologized.

“That’s quite alright,” Julie said. “Thank you for the drink.”

“Julie, it may not happen in four years, but Kelly and I are going to make it onto the Olympic team and win the gold for America,” Lucy suddenly said fiercely. Her eyes looked like they were on fire. “You may not believe me, but I promise you it’ll happen, Julie, we’ll make it happen.”

Julie stared at the girls for a minute. They both reminded her of herself at that age, especially Lucy. Why, the girl had just made her almost the exact same promise she had made her own mother sixteen years ago. As she remembered her own conversation something seemed to slide into place in Julie’s chest. There was only one response appropriate in the face of such determination and it was the one Miriam had give Julie.

“Making the US Olympic team is possibly the most difficult thing either of you will ever attempt and even if one of you makes it that’s no guarantee the other one will,” Julie began, trying to remember her mother’s words of wisdom. “However, if you work hard and put in more effort and dedication toward that single task than anything else in your life I think you two could achieve it.”

“Really?” Kelly asked. She seemed stunned Julie hadn’t shot down their dream.

“I can’t predict the future,” Julie said. “But the best way for you two to reach it is to love and support each other and always give your team your all. Hockey needs six players on the ice at all times and you are always on a team of at least twenty. Hockey is interactive on so many levels that you need a well-rounded team. If you play with what’s best for the team in mind you will get so much farther in hockey than you ever will playing selfishly. That’s true for life too.”

The girls soaked up her words, committing them to memory. Julie didn’t say much after that. She signed their jerseys for them and posed for a few pictures. They gushed a little longer about her and women’s hockey, especially at the collegiate level before Lucy’s mother called them away. Julie had to grin as the girls stumbled away, they had a hard time simultaneously watching where they were going, holding onto Lucy’s sister, and frantically waving goodbye to Julie.

The ache in Julie’s chest had finally stopped. Somehow talking to those girls who were just so enamored with hockey had absolved Julie of her guilt over her Olympic performance. So what if she had never won a gold medal? She had three silvers and a bronze. Julie was tied for second most decorated US female in Winter Olympic history. As for gold medals in general, she had five from competing in nine IIHF Women’s World Championships. Most importantly Julie had played every game she had ever been in at any level of hockey with all of her heart and soul. She had dedicated every fiber of her being to playing women’s hockey and now she was inspiring girls—probably hundreds, if not thousands of girls—to play hockey and fall in love with the sport as she had. If that wasn’t something to be proud of Julie didn’t know what could make anyone proud. Julie may never claim a gold medal with her own hands, but she was certain she had inspired girls who would. Many of these girls would play for America. A generation of gold medalists was far better than Julie being one herself. With that in mind Julie smiled as she ran to catch her plane.


End file.
